New/Old Self

Like just about every other mom I know, I made a vow to myself that I would still be “me” and pursue my passions after the baby was born. I’d just bring the little one along! Or, Tom and I would take turns caring for the baby, while the other was away playing music, doing art, getting some needed “alone time,” whatever. And then I actually had the child, and about a year into it was seriously mourning the death of my former life. There seemed to be no time for “me” after everyone else – child, husband, job, etc. – had received their share. In all honesty, I was tired, confused, sad and lonely. But a few months into Year Two of being the new mom/me, I felt the clouds beginning to lift. I began to accept the changes in my life, and also started to find time to weave in some of my old loves – sewing projects, coffee dates, even dates with my husband (!), and then time to read books, dream some new dreams and eventually begin designing jewelry for new mothers and cooking up the ideas that became Maternal Journey.

I think the toughest part about this time in my life, was that I felt alone. I didn’t really want to have to admit to any unhappiness in my life which was filled with so many good things – healthy child, loving family, good job – what was I bitching about anyway? However, looking back on it, I didn’t seem to notice any other women, friends or strangers, who were any more successful than I was at pursuing pre-baby dreams postpartum.

So it was very cool to read this post by Aussie blogger Robyn Riley of the Herald Sun. She tells the story of world-class runners Paula Radcliffe and Jana Rawlinson who both came back to win the New York City Marathon and the World 400-meter hurdles, respectively, less than a year after giving birth.

Radcliffe and Rawlinson remind me of a woman’s potential to achieve her goals. These women have channeled their experiences of childbirth and motherhood to give them greater strength, confidence and focus. I find their examples incredibly uplifting and inspiring. Becoming a mother does not signal the end of your former life, and it may even propel you to things you never imagined possible. Some women express this in very tangible, visible ways. Like these two elite athletes. Others – and I’m putting myself in this category – find this truth in more subtle ways. Whichever way you get there, I hope you can embrace your new/old self, celebrate your unique potential to achieve greatness as a woman and a mother.

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